print this page


Angela's Letter

written by Julie Stevenson

jump to next story | jump to reviews | go back to fanfiction index

About this story

Published: 1997 | Size: 4 KB (732 words) | Language: english | Rating: PG-13
Average: 4.2/5   4.2/5 (13 votes)

based on stories and characters created by Winnie Holzman

I was having a MSCL Marathon and I got up to "Why Jordan Can't Read." and I watched the scene about Angela's Letter to Jordan, and I thought that would make an interesting piece of fan fic. So I put myself in Angela's shoes and wrote this. Now remember, Angela's letter was 5 pages long. You've been warned.

Dear Jordan,

I almost feel kind of weird staring this letter with 'dear,' because after all you've put me through I'm not sure I would consider you dear to me. At one time, I believed I was in love with you, but I'm relieved to say that I'm not anymore. I think I should start at the beginning.

From the day your arm almost touched my elbow in the middle of our English pop quiz, I was overwhelmingly attracted to you. When I ran into you at Tino's party, I was terrified. When I learned that you knew my name, I was overjoyed. And then Rayanne asked you to get me a fake I.D. I just want to say for the record that I am not, nor have I ever been French. The real reason she asked you for me was because she knew I would be too nervous to ask you myself.

Then you made the I.D. to say that I was exactly one day old. It makes me feel really stupid to know that I paid $30 for a completely worthless piece of paper. And in the car, I was really upset when you kissed me the second time. The first I could understand, but the second was out of line. And it's not that I didn't want to kiss you, because I've lied awake at night, wondering what it would be like to kiss you. But I _loved_ you, and I guess I was just expecting _more_ than just some purely physical fling. But later I would learn to keep my expectations of you much lower.

Then the rumor started that we had sex, and it wasn't that I was apalled or offeneded when you suggested we might as well have done it anyway, I was just shocked because I realized how true your observation really was. In case you never realized it, I would have done anything you wanted me to do, I would have been anyone you wanted me to be, if it would have meant being with you. But the next day, before I could tell you all these things, you told me you had no real interest in me. You might as well have ripped out my heart and stomped on it. I could have died. And for weeks afterwards, I felt miserable. I scalped my Grateful Dead tickets just because you suggested it. Just to pay for the useless I.D. you made me.

Which was _really_ useless, because I never would have tried to get into a bar or a club or a place like Let's BOlt if I hadn't known that you would be there. I wouldn't have gone to Tino's party if I hadn't known that you would be there. I was willing to change my whole identity for you. But what did you care?

And then, a lot of stuff happened taht made me realize I shouldn't have to change for you, I shouldn't have to change for anyone. And I guess I started to realize that you weren't mature or intelligent enough to feel the way I did, or even realize how much you hurt me. It was rather Kafka-esque, really.

And I'm really glad that I don't have to be in love with you anymore, because being in love with you made me do some really stupid things, and hurt people I care about. So I guess what I'm trying to say is that you had your chance. But now I realize that I don't have to change for you. There's nothing really wrong with me. I kept thinking that you were above me, that you were too good for me. But now I realize that I'm too good for you.

Angela Chase

Well, yeah, I know that Angela would have written it better, but we do what we can. Feedback would be appreciated!

Next story

This is the last story so far by this author in this series. Check below for other contributions by this author.

Other fanfiction contributions by this author

Reviews for this story

Rating Distribution:
Average: 4.2/5   4.2/5 (13 votes)
  • Zippiz commented on 27 Feb 2001:
    Great! I always wondered what the letter said. Now if we could just get someone to write the oak tree poem...;o)
  • Matthew commented on 26 Oct 2001:
    Not bad, i could picture Angela saying this.

Add your review

“My dad thinks every person in the world is having more fun than him.”

Angela Chase, Episode 1: "My So-Called Life (Pilot)"