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Chapter 18: I've never realized how much i care for him

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Chapter 18: I've never realized how much i care for him

written by Libbey

added on: 28 Sep 2004 - based on characters created by Winnie Holzman

Last time on my so-called life..."angela: (understanding) yea... so now what?..."

Jordan: (confused) What do you mean "whats next?" i told you that i like, think about you and stuff. What more do you want from me?
Angela is visably taken aback, makes a face and looks away

Angela VO: it never fails, everytime i think that Jordan Catalano is finally opening up to me, he goes and does something like this. Why is it so hard for him to show some real emotion instead of that the whole "rebel pissed-off at the world" persona? More importantly, why do i let him treat me like this? All he ever does is ignore me and push me away until it looks like i'm finally going to grow a backbone and get walk away, then all of the sudden he discovers he has feelings for me. How many more indicators do i need that this relationship, if you could ever call it that, is never going to work?

Angela: This isn't going to work...

Once again, he looks confused (sensing a pattern here?)
Jordan: what isn't going to work, Angela i can't read your mind, are we together or not!?

Angela: Wake up Jordan, we never were together!! You were only using me, and for some sad reason i let you! I wanted so badly for you to turn out to be this brilliantly sensitive, tortured soul, but i can see now that is never going to happen. You don't care aobut me, you never have!

Jordan: And what, you think that guy, Brain, you think he is a better choice? Get real, he's pathetic!

Angela: (snapping) You don't even know him! Brian only wrote that letter because he thought it would make me happy, did you know that? He cares about me so much that he would sacrifice his own feelings for mine! Do you have any idea what you've done to him?

Jordan: What i've done? Looks like you're the one who broke his heart, and how come you're defending him all of the sudden? I thought you hated the guy?

Agela: (realization dawning on her) I've never hated Brian. He's always been there for me, even when i didn't realize or appreciate it. No, i never hated him, i just didn't know how much he meant to me until i read his words. I never knew how much.. how much i loved him...

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“Ignore her. She got up on the wrong side of the coffin this morning.”

Enrique (Rickie) Vasquez, Episode 9: "Halloween"