mid-twenties support group aka: Jody's going to whine

If you want to share some events in your life or thoughts about life in general with other MSCL fans or if you just want post a rant to let some steam off - this is the place.
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Jody Barsch*
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mid-twenties support group aka: Jody's going to whine

Post by Jody Barsch* » Oct 17th 2004, 2:22 am

I don't like my job. Yes, there are things I absolutely love about my job, but for the most part, I'm MISERABLE ALL of the TIME. I am really unhappy, and unlike most jobs that you can quit, whenever, I have to go until June. I spend all of my spare time thinking about what I would rather be doing for a living than this...

I've been thinking about becoming a librarian. As a bibliophile, the prospect of it sounds pretty sexy to me. I told my friend Eve "I really like stamping things." But I guess that's not much to base a career off of. She says I've gone a-wall and that "The misery is setting in. The delirium is starting."
Me: "But doesn't it sound nice? No stress, your nights are yours, I can finally start writing again, and find the time to pick up a book without knowing I'll later have to quiz someone on it?"
Eve: "This whole thing is a tangent that you picked up and ran with. But you need to drop it and pick up something else. No friend of mine is going to be a librarian. I'm telling you. ... You need to take one of those tests."
s**t
And my sister has declared that flight attendant is out.
s**t
And I can't even go back to the old college fall back of party planning, because I suck with deadlines. I really thought a librarian would do it. I live right next to one (a library), and the LA library is gorgeous ... I could work at the UCLA library or I could always go back to SB ...

Honestly, I feel like I'm nine, entertaining all the possibilities that ever came into my head. An Episcopal priest, a city college professor, a hotel maid, a bar tender, someone in publishing, a graduate student, a depressed 24-year-old with two degrees who moves back in with her parents. Really, the options are endless...
Kickstart The Riches movie!

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Natasha (candygirl)
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Post by Natasha (candygirl) » Oct 17th 2004, 2:58 am

I know how you feel Jody. I was lucky enough to find a job that I like, but I have been in your place, hating my job. It's awful because it really begins to affect the rest of your life.

You should really talk to lance about the librarian stuff - he has a lot of background in it.

A friend of mine is a flight attendant and loves it, so don't rule it out just yet. She has a flexible schedule and she gets to travel to great places (she does both domestic and international flights). Why is your sister against it?

Heh, if you suck at deadlines, that rules out a lot of jobs.

:wink:

Seriously, if you are able to do lesson plans and grade papers in a timely manner, you are capable of deadlines, so why not look into becoming an event coordinator/party planner type job?
Natasha aka candygirl :: MSCL.com

Look, if this is weird for you, being tutored? I don't mind helping you a little longer.
You could have sex with me if you really want to help...I guess that's a "no"?

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Jody Barsch*
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Post by Jody Barsch* » Oct 17th 2004, 3:13 am

candygirl wrote:You should really talk to lance about the librarian stuff - he has a lot of background in it.
Very cool, I'd love to hear everything he has to say.
candygirl wrote:Why is your sister against it?
I don't remember exactly what she said, but it was something along the lines of equating flight attendants to whores. She doesn't really think that, and it was just hyperbole, but I don't think she thinks it would ultimately make me happy.
candygirl wrote:Seriously, if you are able to do lesson plans and grade papers in a timely manner
Two of the primaray stressors of the job...
candygirl wrote:Why not look into becoming an event coordinator/party planner type job?
I'm not sure it actually interests me, it was just what my best friend and I always said we would pursue every time finals rolled around and we felt like dropping out.

Wow, all of a sudden it just started to pour!
Kickstart The Riches movie!

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Post by Nostradamus » Oct 17th 2004, 4:32 am

Jody Barsch* wrote:equating flight attendants to whores.
It's different now because of all the regulation, but I've heard some stories about the good old days of air travel...

:shock: :-P

Seriously though, why did you become a teacher, and why did you change your mind?
I have never killed a man, but I have read many obituaries with great pleasure.
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I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
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starbug
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Post by starbug » Oct 17th 2004, 9:22 am

Yep, been there. In fact, I am there. But I'm doing something about it, so I don't feel too bad. It's just that the something will take 2 years.... and I don't hate my job that much that I can't live with it. My boss, now that's another story...

Anyway, I've sometimes had the yearning to be a librarian too. All that peace and quiet on your working day etc... but I have a sneaky suspicion that that's just what the visitors to the library see. I'm pretty sure there are many hidden stresses behind the 'shop floor' of the actually library - it's just that the staff don't let you see it. Lance would be able to tell you, for sure.

I know a few teachers, and lots of them go through phases of hatred of the profession. What is it that you don't like about it? Are there factors that you could make go away by moving job but still being a teacher? Is it possible that you've mistaken hatred of your job, for hatred of your profession?

Heh - on the air hostess front, I recall the days when they all looked like models. Now you're more likely to get some old broiler serving you your coke... :wink:

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Natasha (candygirl)
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Post by Natasha (candygirl) » Oct 17th 2004, 10:59 pm

Jody Barsch* wrote:equating flight attendants to whores.
I actually know a few flight attendants as well as a pilot, and I can assure you that they are not whores in any sense of the word. If the reputation of this occupation bothers you, then you shouldn't bother considering a career in this field (or several others). One of my old roommates was a massage therapist. When people found out, there were two reactions: (1) the people who wanted a free massage on the spot and (2) the people who assumed she was really a prostitute. She worked in a chiropracter's office and people still assumed that she was really performing sexual favors, which she NEVER did. Just another occupational stereotype.

:mrgreen:

Obviously, some of our acquaintances were disappointed about that!
Natasha aka candygirl :: MSCL.com

Look, if this is weird for you, being tutored? I don't mind helping you a little longer.
You could have sex with me if you really want to help...I guess that's a "no"?

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Jody Barsch*
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Post by Jody Barsch* » Oct 17th 2004, 11:11 pm

Actually, I had never really considered that that was a reputation that went along with flight attendants -- I mean, yeah, I'm aware of the stereotype, but I never thought of it as more. I really know very little about it as a career, but it has always seemed very appealing to me. I doubt highly that my sister meant it in a sexual way either, rather more like you're having to run around on your feet all day catering to everyone's demands. It seems like working for something like Virgin Airlines or something would be really cool.
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Jody Barsch*
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Post by Jody Barsch* » Oct 17th 2004, 11:13 pm

I have TOTALLY considered becoming a massage therapist!!
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Post by Nothingman » Oct 18th 2004, 12:44 pm

If you don't like your job, get out. I can understand you have an obligation to your students so that you can't just quit. But now you've got time to figure out what your next step will be.

Some important things to consider that haven't been touched on are:
How much money do you want to make?
Do you want to be financially independent?
Do you want to take time off to have kids?
Is it ok to bring work home with you, or do you want to leave it at the office?
Is traveling ok, and if so, how much?
What hours do you want to work?
Where do you want to live?
Do you want to be able to advance in the field?
Do you want to end up a career woman, or a homemaker?

There are a lot of jobs that are fun to do, but don't get you anywhere. And there are a lot of rewarding careers that have demanding, pay your dues, kind of beginning to them. Consequently, you first have to figure out where you want to end up so that you can properly access where you should be today.
"To come to your senses, you must first go out of your mind." - Alan Watts

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Post by LittleWildheart » Oct 18th 2004, 2:08 pm

Jody Barsch* wrote: rather more like you're having to run around on your feet all day catering to everyone's demands.
Have you ever worked in the service industry? I've worked customer service since I was 15. It is Not. Fun. Ever. I've lost all faith in the human race. In fact I'm contemplating quitting my job now too because I'm (finally) almost done with my degree, and the jerks aren't letting me go home and see my family for Christmas *or* Thanksgiving (my husband is in Iraq and my family is 2000 miles away). I don't graduate until May but I'm pretty sure I'm going to quit in December just so I can go home for a while. I've had it with the job and the deployment and being homesick, and I HATE my job with a passion anyway...so why stay? I can always get another job. I can even start looking for a REAL job, since I only have one semester left.

Ok...sorry. That turned in to a whole lil rant about me. LOL! But, um, my advice would be to avoid the flight attendant job. There will always, without a doubt, be people whose only pleasure in life is treating you like crap, no matter how good you are. :roll:

But good luck with finding something that makes you happy...that's what's important!

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wicked
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Post by wicked » Oct 18th 2004, 2:22 pm

WHEN I GROW UP I'M GOING TO BE AN ASTRONAUGHT...or a ballerina...
thats my final decision... or wait a vet, no a firefighter ... :wink:


Follow your bliss if your able if ya can't then try and think of it as doing what you have to do to be able to do what you want to do.


there's always time for change.


sorry I'm absolutely no help at all... but feel free to whine ANY time!!! it does a body good!!!
"So this is hell. I'd never have believed it. You remember all we were told about the torture-chambers, the fire and brimstone, the "burning marl." Old wive's tales! There's no need for red-hot pokers. HELL IS - OTHER PEOPLE!"

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Post by emmie » Oct 18th 2004, 4:48 pm

I totally know where you are coming from Jody!! I have waited tables since I was 16. and most places are really cool and rewarding. plus you make great friends. but a couple of places really made my life miserable, for the same reasons you mentioned. in the end, I took a lower paying job just so that I could have a better frame of mind. but I know it's not exactly comparable since waiting tables is only temporary and not my career.

when I finished my undergrad I had a bit of a early twenties crisis. I had all these plans for grad school and everything. but then suddenly I began to freak out and question everything. it was very difficult to sign away 2 1/2 years of my life to more school. and I had question if my dreams were really in fact my dreams. I was totally freaking out. and after that, I began to doubt if I would even get into a grad school in my field. so I began making many plan Bs. lucky for me, it all worked out and I'm reasonably content with my school. but it was kind of exciting to think outside of my little box at all the possibilities I had.

I agree that maybe you should look for another job in the same field. maybe you could be one of those tutors to child/teenage actors! since you live in L.A. and all. and you would only have to work like 5 hours a day, and only have a few students. :P dunno, just a thought!

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Post by SanDeE* » Oct 18th 2004, 8:00 pm

emmie, thanks for your post. I'm currently finishing up my undergrad and I'm freaking out. I'm a senior, but I have a year to go... I'll have a third senior semester and graduate in December 2005. So that buys me some more time to decide what I want to do. It seems like there are endless possibilities and very few possibilities at the same time. Does that make any sense?

I have a great job back home that always takes me back every summer. I work as a cashier at an organic grocery co-op. Overall, I really like it, but there are the few customers that have a problem with you no matter what you say, how you act, and how you look. But I'm really lucky at the co-op, because they are pretty flexible and they understand about holidays, travel, being a college student during the summer, weddings, etc. The mindset and attitude there is wonderful too. The job I had before that wasn't so great. It was also a customer service job - I worked at a golf course in guest services. My co-workers didn't like me so much, and I was never scheduled for enough hours to even pay for the gas it took to get out there, no matter how much I told them I was very available for more shifts. The golfers/customers were jerks too --- they said stuff like "hey, why don'tcha send blondie down here?" and they'd spit chewing tabacco on my shoe, I'd clean up their cart and their clubs, drive them to their car, and they'd give me less than one dollar for a tip. Really lame. Jody: avoid golf course jobs, unless you're the boss, I suppose.
Um, in my room, one seam is a little off and I stare at it constantly. It's, like, destroying me.

~~Kristin~~

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lance
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Post by lance » Oct 18th 2004, 10:55 pm

candygirl wrote:I know how you feel Jody. I was lucky enough to find a job that I like, but I have been in your place, hating my job. It's awful because it really begins to affect the rest of your life.

You should really talk to lance about the librarian stuff - he has a lot of background in it.

A friend of mine is a flight attendant and loves it, so don't rule it out just yet. She has a flexible schedule and she gets to travel to great places (she does both domestic and international flights). Why is your sister against it?

Heh, if you suck at deadlines, that rules out a lot of jobs.

:wink:

Seriously, if you are able to do lesson plans and grade papers in a timely manner, you are capable of deadlines, so why not look into becoming an event coordinator/party planner type job?
Jody I can totally empthasize and sympathize with your situation. Also e-mail me and I will give you the low down on all you need to know about getting into libraries. I would tell you now but it grows late and my brain is tired.

-LanceMan

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