Guys...

If you want to share some events in your life or thoughts about life in general with other MSCL fans or if you just want post a rant to let some steam off - this is the place.
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special_k
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Post by special_k » Sep 16th 2004, 7:47 am

Why is it that just when guys start to notice you, someone you care for dearly comes to realize how much you mean to them? Sometimes it feels like dealing with men requires a passport.
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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Post by wicked » Sep 16th 2004, 8:56 am

snerk...well I'll tell you one thing...it doesn't get that much easier with time! :lol:

I guess the thing is that they get to SEE you in a different way, they see that you are desirable to others, which makes them re-evalute how they saw you int he first palce. Be careful though because a lot of the time the chase is what makes it interesting, not the getting.

( I could quote star trek at this point but that would really be showing my geeky side )

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Post by starbug » Sep 16th 2004, 9:43 am

wicked wrote: ( I could quote star trek at this point but that would really be showing my geeky side )
Nah, you'd fit right in :wink: have you witnessed some of the geek conversations on here?!

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Post by Nothingman » Sep 16th 2004, 1:09 pm

We want to be with someone who has market value. The more people who are interested in you the more that will be interested in you. That's why these things seem to come in waves. We also like a challenge, if we can have ahead of the other guys who are interested in you then we have established that our value is higher and therefor it's an ego boost to us. This works the same way with the genders reversed as well.

As far as someone close to you finally telling you how they feel, they have been put in a situation where they must make a choice. Before they were content with the possibility of something developing, or were just too shy to ask. Now, with other people in the picture they have to act on that possibility or accept that the possibility would be gone. Now that the stakes are higher its worth risking the friendship where before it wasn't.

It's usually frustrating that they couldn't tell you it sooner, but this is the way things go. Ideally you want to always appear in demand, even if you aren't. The better you get at this, the more substained the interest in you becomes.
"To come to your senses, you must first go out of your mind." - Alan Watts

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Post by special_k » Sep 16th 2004, 1:14 pm

wicked wrote: ( I could quote star trek at this point but that would really be showing my geeky side )
Classic or Next Gen? One guy I knew actually freaked over all my action figures. Like, his thing was collecting women. I certainly never nailed him on that one. He was past sell-by date rather quickly.
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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Post by special_k » Sep 16th 2004, 1:21 pm

wicked wrote: I guess the thing is that they get to SEE you in a different way, they see that you are desirable to others, which makes them re-evalute how they saw you int he first palce. Be careful though because a lot of the time the chase is what makes it interesting, not the getting.
It won't go beyond the chase for sometime, as it can really only lead to marriage and neither of us is ready for that. Plus, there's the expectation of kids looming over us. Nuh-uh. I've got enough to deal with sorting through my own life. I have to be honest here. I make a better aunt than mother. Besides, as women, we mother the world. *Sigh*
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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Post by wicked » Sep 16th 2004, 1:27 pm

ROFLMAO...OK I was going to quote SPOCK in AMOK TIME

"After a time, you may find that having is not so
pleasing a thing after all as wanting. It is not logical; but
it is often true."



doh! and there I was being all cool and grown up...snerk.My DH has to deal with my ST obsession on a daily babsis. When he worked for Geordi la forge...oops I mean Levar Burton I made sure I got to meet him!





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Post by special_k » Sep 16th 2004, 1:35 pm

Nothingman wrote:We want to be with someone who has market value. The more people who are interested in you the more that will be interested in you. That's why these things seem to come in waves. We also like a challenge, if we can have ahead of the other guys who are interested in you then we have established that our value is higher and therefor it's an ego boost to us. This works the same way with the genders reversed as well.

As far as someone close to you finally telling you how they feel, they have been put in a situation where they must make a choice. Before they were content with the possibility of something developing, or were just too shy to ask. Now, with other people in the picture they have to act on that possibility or accept that the possibility would be gone. Now that the stakes are higher its worth risking the friendship where before it wasn't.

It's usually frustrating that they couldn't tell you it sooner, but this is the way things go. Ideally you want to always appear in demand, even if you aren't. The better you get at this, the more substained the interest in you becomes.
I think he may have briefly seen someone which caused him to reconsider things. I'm touched, to be certain, but this is someone I very much want to see happy...even if not with me. Friendship does funny things to you. I don't want to compromise what we have for a chance at something that might not last at this point.

Nothingman, you've provided me with an interesting look inside the male mind. Kamsahamnida! (thank you) >_<
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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Post by special_k » Sep 16th 2004, 1:39 pm

wicked wrote:ROFLMAO...OK I was going to quote SPOCK in AMOK TIME

"After a time, you may find that having is not so
pleasing a thing after all as wanting. It is not logical; but
it is often true."



doh! and there I was being all cool and grown up...snerk.My DH has to deal with my ST obsession on a daily babsis. When he worked for Geordi la forge...oops I mean Levar Burton I made sure I got to meet him!

True, but you get to a point where you just know that you want to wake up with the same person everyday. That their well being is paramount to you. That theirs is the shoulder upon which you wish to nestle your head tonight, tomorrow night, and the night after that... Something does come after all the games, and I expect it must be worthwhile.

DH? ^_^
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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Post by wicked » Sep 16th 2004, 1:44 pm


True, but you get to a point where you just know that you want to wake up with the same person everyday. That their well being is paramount to you. That theirs is the shoulder upon which you wish to nestle your head tonight, tomorrow night, and the night after that... Something does come after all the games, and I expect it must be worthwhile.

DH? ^_^
sorry DH= Dear Husband, also known as Hubby or the hubster.

OH I'm in total agreement with you.I'm married 12 years...or 13 ...sheit...sorry LOL . I'm just talking about people wanting things, or suddenly finding something/someone attractive because someone else has/wants it. I think that has more to do with Biology than anything else.

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Post by special_k » Sep 16th 2004, 2:58 pm

wicked wrote: sorry DH= Dear Husband, also known as Hubby or the hubster.

OH I'm in total agreement with you.I'm married 12 years...or 13 ...sheit...sorry LOL . I'm just talking about people wanting things, or suddenly finding something/someone attractive because someone else has/wants it. I think that has more to do with Biology than anything else.
Aren't you the lucky one! How did the two of you meet? I know about the bilogical factor only too well... *Groan*
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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Post by wicked » Sep 16th 2004, 4:21 pm

Aren't you the lucky one! How did the two of you meet? I know about the bilogical factor only too well... *Groan*
awe..well I was quite a club kid back in the dya..LOL I had it worked out so I could dance for free every night. ANYWAY I digress, so on one of my nights out dancing I ran into an old friend from art school who I hadn't seen in a few years..when I waved to him across the dance floor he though "hey I'm gettin lucky tonight" I thought he was just thinking "Oh there's noelle."

LOL I hadn't realise d I had changed the much...gone from shaved head to long bleach blond hair crimped within an inch of it's life ...anyway when he realised who it was he invited me a party I ended up crammed into this tiny car traveling for more than an hr to a party where i didn't know anyone. I turned around in the car to say something to someone and there in the back seat was a man with the most amazing eyes!!!! Well that was it I was determined to meet this guy and aactually get to really talk to him. I kinda cornered him and came up with some pretnecious stuff to say...luckily he looked past this. we exchanged phone numbers.....


then he didn't call....

being me this never stopped me LOL!!! I phone him up and asked him for a date ( to this day he says he was going to call the next day...yeeeaaahhh :wink: ) the rest is history.

Oh yeah he was a bass palyer in a rock band...LOL I helped support him through school for computer animation,. We got married when he was hired to work for ILM down in CA, and if we weren't married I couldn't go. And now we are busy trying to get some projects going , making a short film raising a family etc etc etc.

so not especially romatic proposla of marrigae "hey we'd better get married so I can come with you to california"...actually he never did propose.... but he is very romantic at heart.


and I love him... and he loves me so it's a good life.

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Post by Jody Barsch* » Sep 16th 2004, 8:40 pm

Nothingman wrote:As far as someone close to you finally telling you how they feel, they have been put in a situation where they must make a choice. Before they were content with the possibility of something developing, or were just too shy to ask. Now, with other people in the picture they have to act on that possibility or accept that the possibility would be gone. Now that the stakes are higher its worth risking the friendship where before it wasn't.
I kind of had the reverse thing happen to me last winter. Maybe a week after my best friend proposed to his girlfriend of five years, he told me he had feelings for me -- to the extent that he was talking about what our future lives would be like together... I had always thought there was a little crush between us, but what he started telling me took me completely aback. They were married this spring, and I'm still reeling.
Kickstart The Riches movie!

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Post by emmie » Sep 16th 2004, 10:44 pm

best friends can be such a complicated relationship. *sigh* I've been in love with my best friend for about 5 years. and it seems that yes, he is only interested in me when I finally begin to "get over him" and see someone else. the worst feeling is dropping the new person only to have your best friend change their mind after a few weeks. so perhpas Nothingman has a point.

I was going to write that I'm the same person no matter how many men are interested in me. but that's not exactly true. I find that I do gain a bit of confidence when some is interested. and confidence can be quite attractive.

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Post by special_k » Sep 17th 2004, 12:16 am

Usually when I'm at my most carefree is when the guys start to queue. Confidence does kind of play into that spiritedness some guys find intoxicating, others maddening.

Nothingman should have a There Might Be Giants song written about him. ^^
"Sometimes things happen between people that you don't really expect. And sometimes the things that are important are the ones that seem the weirdest or the most wrong, and those are the ones that change your life."

Jessie, "Once and Again"

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