Future Fan Fic Project?

Discussion and questions about the FanFiction section of MSCL.com. You can also post excerpts of your unfinished stories here if you're looking for feedback or ideas.
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TomSpeed
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Post by TomSpeed » Apr 9th 2003, 9:46 pm

Just an update.

I had a scene all ready to add this morning at about 12:15 AM. But my computer crashed as I was jumping on the internet. I thought I had saved it, but I didn't. So, I need to rewrite it. The scene involved Angela and Brian discussing ideas and why Angela chose to become a college professor. Hopefully, I'll be able get that scene or another one posted soon.

One problem I have is that I want to fill each day with activity. The show handled time in a much more fluid way. You weren't sure what day some actions were taking place. This fluidity probably helps with story lines, but I like things to be more ordered. I'm going to have to shake my compulsion though because skipping/collapsing time necessary for TV. Of course, I did cover 10 years in less than a week (story time-wise) in my last story. But it was really long.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by TomSpeed » Apr 15th 2003, 5:44 pm

Man, it's been almost a week since I posted anything on this thread. I've had a few false starts on recreating the scene I lost involving Angela and Brian. I've simply been unable to match the feeling that scene gave me. Damn my home computer! Their relationship seems false in a way I can't put my finger on at the moment. Maybe it's the lack of anything to argue about? There's no tension between them.

I'm really interested in dealing more with Rayanne. For some reason, I thought she should continue her acting and be in Cat on a Hot Tin Roof. Unfortunately, I've almost totally forgotten the play. So, I'm rereading it. I'm not sure how much of the play I will use for the story. I'll probably only use a few lines.

I'll try to have more scenes in a couple days.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by TomSpeed » Apr 21st 2003, 11:44 pm

A new scene! A new scene! I opt out of having Angela and Brian having an intellectual discussion in this part of the story. I'm going to introduce an intellectual discussion during dinner at the Chase house later. Pretty much this scene tries to tie in my previous story a little bit and establishes the comfort level that Angela and Brian have achieved thus far. I also try to mirror a scene involving Patty and Graham from "Pressure." We don't hear the rest of the conversation that takes place between Angela and Rayanne. Their conversation will probably generate some plot points, which, unfortunately, I have yet to decide upon. Anyway, here is the new scene.

*****

Part Seven -- On the Brink


Location: Angela’s apartment, later that evening. Brian is sitting on the couch. Angela is lying on the couch, her head resting in Brian’s lap. Brian is running his fingers through Angela’s hair. Half-empty wineglasses are sitting on the coffee table. Music plays softly from the stereo. [Music cue: Fleetwood Mac, “Think About Me,” Tusk.]

Angela – So, you might not have kissed me when you first saw me in the gym if Sharon hadn’t pushed you?

Brian – That’s a hard question to answer. I wanted to kiss you. She definitely made things easier for me.

Angela – That was our second kiss. Do you remember our first kiss?

Brian – Sure. You took me to the airport for my flight to New York. You said you wanted to give me something to remember you.

Angela – Did it work? I mean I probably only saw you three or four times over 10 years. We never talked about it.

Brian – It worked.

(Angela slowly sits up next to Brian. She looks at him for a few seconds.)

Angela – Show me.

(Brian pulls Angela closer to him. He puts his arms around her. She does the same. They kiss.)

[Fade Out]

(The telephone starts ringing.)

[Fade In]

[Music cue: Fleetwood Mac, “Save Me a Place,” Tusk.]

(Angela is lying on top of Brian on the couch. They are continuing to kiss.)

Angela – The machine will answer it.

Brian – Good.

(The answering machine answers.)

Angela’s voice from answering machine – Hi, this is Dr. Angela Chase. I’m not available to take your call. Please leave a message after the beep.

[beep]

Rayanne’s voice from answering machine – Dr., Dr., I stubbed my toe –

(Angela breaks away from Brian.)

Angela – I need to take this call.

Rayanne’s voice – I might need immediate medical attention –

Brian – OK.

(Angela walks over to her desk.)

Rayanne’s voice – So, give me a call as soon as you get this message.

Angela – Hey, Rayanne. You stubbed your toe?

Rayanne – [Rayanne is calling from Amber’s house. Amber and Nathan are playing Candyland on Amber’s living room floor.] Oh, Angelfood, you’re home. [pause] I hope I wasn’t interrupting anything.

Angela – No, not really.

Rayanne – Great! I seem to have this knack for calling people at the most inappropriate times. Sharon swears that I call just about every time she and Eric are having sex.

Angela – No kidding.

(Brian walks by Angela holding a basketball.)

Brian – I’m going to shoot some hoops. [pause] It will help me work off a little energy.

Angela – (Angela smiles.) OK.

Rayanne – Oh my God! Who is there with you? Is that Brian?

Angela – Yes, Brian’s here.

Rayanne – (Rayanne hits her head.) I’ve done it again, haven’t I?

Angela – Technically, no, you haven’t.

Rayanne – That’s good. Say, “Hi,” to Brian for me.

Angela – [to Brian] Rayanne says, “Hi.”

(Brian bounces the basketball in the foyer.)

Brian – Tell her I say, “Hi,” back.

(He opens the door and exits.)

Angela – Brian says, “Hi” back.


*****

Fleetwood Mac's Tusk? I love this album. It's long, varied, and thoughtful. It's good makeout background music, too. Angela and Brian are in their late twenties. I'm sure they have discovered Fleetwood Mac. Plus, I just popped the CD in when I started writing.
Last edited by TomSpeed on Jul 29th 2003, 9:04 pm, edited 4 times in total.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by TomSpeed » Apr 23rd 2003, 12:28 am

I don't think it's fair to just hang a title on Angela. Plus, high school is an important element in the show. College probably should be an element in my story. Plus, this scene allows me to incorporate one of my favorite writers into the story. I'm going to take elements of Carson McCuller's story and weave them into Brian's character development. What has he been doing for 10 years? Angela has Jordan and Shelby in her past. Brian has Delia, Susan, and Angela. Anyway, I don't think having both Brian and Angela being virgins at 27-28 is very realistic. You can only throw your life into work so much. So, here is me giving my favorite writer a plug and setting up a plot point.

*****

Part Eight -- Trees, Rocks, and Clouds


Location: Classroom at the University. Angela is teaching. There are about 15 students in the classroom.

(Angela leaves her chair and walks around to the front of her table. She sits on top of the table.

Angela – OK, can someone give me his first impression of “A Tree*A Rock*A Cloud?”

(No one volunteers.)

Angela – I know that it’s early in the semester and early in the day. (She picks up a coffee cup and sips.) I have my coffee. So, I’m ready to go. (She puts the coffee cup on the table and picks up her seating chart.) Mr. Gee, can you tell us what strikes you first about Mrs. McCullers’s story?

Mr. Gee – The hobo in the story is very lonely.

Angela – Good. Why is he lonely, Mr. McLendon?

Mr. McLendon – Because he hasn’t completed his scientific approach to finding love.

Miss Albergotti – He will never find a woman to replace his wife. He’s never going to make the leap. He’s scared.

Angela – What is he afraid of?

Mr. Gee – He is afraid of being hurt again.

Angela – Wouldn’t it be natural for him to be scared? His wife left him for another man. He loved her deeply. He loved her so much that he traveled for years all around the country looking for her. That type of hurt runs deep.

Mr. Salley – The hurt runs deep. But you just have to put things like this behind you. I mean if we all retreated from reality the way this guy does how would anything get done?

Miss Albergotti – Don’t we create our own reality?

Mr. Gee – Well, I wouldn’t spend my life learning to love trees, rocks, and clouds.
Last edited by TomSpeed on May 1st 2003, 8:05 pm, edited 2 times in total.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by lithiumkat » Apr 25th 2003, 3:37 am

I must say, I'm very impressed so far. I like all your little transitions very mscl-ism-ish (yes i made up a word...deal w/ it) like the in the refridgerater for---three hours, we've been here for three hours. i love that stuff its so cool. anyway, yes, i think you are doing a pretty good job with the charachter developement. can't wait to read more, i'd love to see where you're going with this lol assuming you figure that out. oh by the way you will probably think i'ma dummy but i'm new to the forums and i keep seeing imo what the hell is imo, i've heard of lol, rofl, lmao and whatnot but never imo so please enlighten me, i'm dying to know what the hell imo means!!! the suspense is killing me! lol.
"people always say how you should be yourself, like yourself is this definite thing...like a toaster or something, like you can know what it is even."

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Post by TomSpeed » Apr 25th 2003, 9:44 am

in my humble opinion (IMHO)

This is an Angela-ism in the show. I guess it's a way to preface an opinion some people aren't going to like; or it's used to give weight to an opinion. Or you can use it as a segue. Patty says it, too.

I appreciate your interest in the story, lithiumkat. I'm not a very dedicated writer. I should write some every day. But I usually don't. However, I do think about the story quite a bit. I usually don't write from an outline, so I don't really know what's going to happen in the story except for broad themes and general directions. I'm going to try to really work on the story this weekend.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by heater_05 » Apr 25th 2003, 1:54 pm

Hello,

Tomspeed, great stuff. I really like the feel you have the characters. They seem very real and true to the show. I can't wait to read the rest. We need more fanfiction. I have read almost every continuation script in the archive. But, there are rarely new ones.

As far as how quickly Angela and Brain hop into bed, I think you can have them have sex fairly soon. I mean not right away, but they are adults now in their late 20's. They have both have had serious realtionships in the time apart. I don't believe they would hop into bed on the second date, but clearly they are older and have done this before. I think they would purposley want to take it slow because they are aprehensive and want the relationship to work. I think it is important to establish a relationship beyond sex. Show them getting along, which you are doing beautifully. But, then sex should come gradually but I think it could happen very soon. They should have some issue about it. Like being afraid to go their because what they have created is so good, or just a general fear of where the relationship is going.

Anyway I have rambled to long. I am a frustrated writer. I think its time to write my own fanfiction.
"It just goes to show you, if it's not one thing it's another, but it's always something!"

Roseanne Roseannadanna

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Post by TomSpeed » Apr 29th 2003, 11:37 am

Part Nine -- The Best Made Plans


Location: Sharon and Rayanne are having lunch at Sharon’s house. They are sitting at the kitchen table.

Rayanne – So, you getting pregnant definitely spoils Eric’s five year plan. It’s what, year three of your marriage?

Sharon – I know. He tried to take the news in stride, but I could tell he was a little upset. Making plans and sticking to them is important to him.

Rayanne – Sometimes, life is all about dealing with things you haven’t planned how to handle. You can take precautions, but things can surprise you.

Sharon – Did getting pregnant with Nathan surprise you?

Rayanne – I was totally surprised. I had not planned to have a child until sometime in the distant future. But a trip to Vegas, too many shots of tequila, and meeting a sexy French guy named Pierre forced me to revise my plans.

Sharon – You never saw Pierre again. Did you ever think about having an abortion or putting the baby up for adoption?

Rayanne – I thought about all of my options. I couldn’t think about anything else for a long time. In the end, I decided to keep my baby. There was a double bonus for me. Not only did I have a beautiful, healthy, and amazing baby boy; I also was able to quit drinking. There’s nothing like having a life inside of you to make you stop drinking cold turkey.
Last edited by TomSpeed on May 1st 2003, 8:13 pm, edited 2 times in total.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by Guest » Apr 29th 2003, 11:52 am

More please :D

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TomSpeed
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Post by TomSpeed » May 3rd 2003, 8:06 pm

The fact that Angela and Danielle don't live at home anymore makes it kind of difficult to include Graham and Patty in the story. However, they were such an important part of the show, it would be a shame to ignore them completely. So, I'm trying to work them into the story. Also, I just think Camille is such a great character, I work her into the story, too.

*****

Part Ten – The Empty Nest Syndrome


Location: Chase house, early evening. Patty and Camille are having coffee at the kitchen table.

Camille – Why don’t you just admit you are bored?

Patty – Okay, I’m bored. Danielle moved out of the house three years ago. She travels all of the time for her job. Angela rarely visits. I didn’t realize how much of my life was filled by the girls. Now that they on their own, I have all of this free time.

Camille – Why don’t you and Graham start traveling? Get one of those big RVs or something and hit the road.

Patty – We can’t get away to long. Graham has the restaurant. I have the print shop. We just can’t leave for long periods of time.

Camille – Well, maybe you should go on a short vacation. A three or four day weekend in the country would be great. Andy and I hiked part of the Appalachian Trail last Spring. We had a blast while we were away from work, telephones, and the general craziness of modern life.

Patty – I hate hiking. Graham hates it, too. The last time we went hiking, he got these huge blisters on his feet. I spent hours rubbing lotion on his feet to make him comfortable.

Camille – Sounds romantic to me.

(Patty smiles.)

Patty – It was romantic in a way.

Camille – You rubbed lotion on him. He rubbed lotion on you.

(Patty blushes. She leaves the table to get more coffee.)

Patty – That’s not really what I’m talking about. I don’t want so much to find something for Graham and I to do together. I want to find something for me. I want to do something meaningful, interesting, and exciting. It would be great to really stick my hands into something and get things done.

(Patty returns to the table.)

Camille – I think I know what you can do.

Patty – What?

Camille – Why don't you start publishing books like you've been talking about?

Patty – It's a big risk. Publishing is very competitive.

Camille – Well, you should think about it. You don't want to spend your life wishing you had tried to do it.

Patty – Okay, I’ll think about it.


Part Eleven – News from Home


Location: Angela’s apartment, early evening. Angela is talking on the telephone to Sharon, who is calling from her bedroom at the Melton house.

Angela – I can’t believe you are pregnant. Congratulations!

Sharon – Thanks. It was certainly a surprise for Eric and me. We didn’t really plan on having children so soon. But these things tend to happen when you least expect them.

Angela – Have you told your mom and dad yet?

Sharon – Not yet. I’m going to tell them tonight. The only people I’ve told so far are you, Rayanne, and Eric, of course. I wanted to wait awhile for the news to sink in for myself first.

Angela VO* -- It only bothers me a little bit that Sharon told Rayanne the news before me. I’m not really sure why.

Angela – Listen, I’m coming to town in two weeks to see Rayanne’s play. We’ll celebrate. It will be girls’ night out.

Sharon – That sounds great! [pause] Let’s see. Rayanne has a baby. I’m going to have a baby. I guess that means you are going to be next. These things tend to happen in threes.

Angela – Please, I am so far from having a baby, it’s not even funny. Anyway, I’m not even sure I want to have children. I like my life the way it is now. I write and teach. A baby would just complicate things.

Sharon – What does Brian think about having children?

Angela – I don’t know. We haven’t talked about it.

Sharon – You have been spending a great deal of time together. Maybe you should talk about it.

Angela – Maybe we will. Anyway, congratulations again. I’m so excited for you. See you soon, okay?

Sharon – Yea, see you soon.
Last edited by TomSpeed on May 9th 2003, 10:19 am, edited 1 time in total.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by TomSpeed » May 5th 2003, 5:26 pm

I didn't like having Patty thinking about running for the city council. So, I have her considering branching out into publishing instead. I just get the sense that she has to do something to make up for not being involved in her daughters' lives as she once was.

Writing this episode just isn't driving me the way the last one did. I'm not sure why. Maybe the high school dynamic helped focus things. I'm going to try to finish this story, but I'm not so sure about doing future episodes. I'm definitely going to have to use outlines and plan more.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by TomSpeed » May 12th 2003, 12:23 am

Part Twelve


Location: Angela’s apartment, later in the evening. Angela is sitting at her desk.

Angela VO* -- Brian and I have been dating for almost four months. It doesn’t seem possible. That’s a long time. I dated Shelby for almost a year. Of course, I was in a relationship with Jordan for about thirteen years. But I can’t really say that we were dating for all of that time. I’m not really sure how to categorize our relationship. Hell with infrequent cool fronts might be a good way to describe it. That isn’t really fair though. He gave me what he could. But I always wanted more. It’s amazing what time’s passing can accomplish. I can almost look objectively at my relationship with Jordan.

(Angela leaves her desk. She walks to the other side of the apartment. She approaches her dartboard. She removes the darts, steps back, and starts to throw them.)

Angela VO* -- What do I want from Brian? Is that a fair question to ask? I could probably ask what he wants from me. Where is our relationship going? That’s a good question. Did I ask these questions during my previous relationships?

(Angela returns to the dartboard again. She removes the darts and steps back.)

Angela VO* -- I’ll at least start the conversation if I get three bull’s-eyes.

(She starts to throw the darts. One dart hits the bull’s eye. A second dart hits the bull’s-eye.)

Angela VO* -- I’m getting too good at darts. I guess I learned something useful during my relationship with Shelby.

(Angela closes her eyes. She throws the third dart. It hits the bull’s-eye.)

Angela VO* -- Damn!


Part Thirteen


Location: POTR Theater, same time. Rayanne, John, and Rickie are on stage. Mr. Katimsky is seated in the first row of seats facing the stage.

Mr. Katimsky – Okay, this is the last run-through for tonight.

Rayanne – I don’t know why I put myself through this torture. I should be home playing with Nathan.

Rickie – You do it because you love to act.

Rayanne – I must be a masochist.

Mr. Katimsky – Places!

(Rickie goes backstage. Rayanne and John take their marks.)

Mr. Katimsky – Rayanne, remember to quicken your [long pause] pace and increase [long pause] your volume.

Rayanne – I got it.

Mr. Katimsky – Action!

Rayanne [as Margaret] – You see? -- They gloat over us being childless, even in front of their five little no-neck monsters!

Mr. Katimsky – Voices downstairs. Time is growing short.

Rayanne -- Brick? -- I’ve been to a doctor in Memphis, -- a – a gynecologist…I’ve been completely examined, and there is no reason why we can’t have a child whenever we want one. And this is my time by the calendar to conceive. Are you listening to me? Are you? Are you LISTENING TO ME!

John [as Brick] – Yes, I hear you, Maggie. – But how in hell do you imagine – that you’re going to have a child by a man that can’t stand you?

Rayanne – That’s a problem I will have to work out.

Mr. Katimsky – Voices coming upstairs. Maggie turns to face the door.

Rayanne – Here they come.

Mr. Katimsky – Cut! Great job, Rayanne. Okay, that’s a wrap for tonight.

Rayanne – I’m out of here.

(Rayanne goes backstage. Rickie approaches her. They walk towards the exit together.)

Rickie – You’re going to a meeting tomorrow morning?

(Rayanne stops walking. She turns towards Rickie.)

Rayanne – Of course, I’m going to a meeting tomorrow morning. I always go to a meeting on Saturday mornings if I have rehearsal on Friday nights. You know my schedule.

Rickie – I know.

Rayanne – Why do you ask me then? How many years have I been sober?

Rickie – You’ve been sober for four years.

Rayanne – So, why are you so concerned?

Rickie – I’m concerned because I care about you. And I know how much effort you put into acting.

Rayanne – I’m going to be fine. I know how important meetings are to my recovery. I’m going to one tomorrow.

Rickie – Are you coming to Church on Sunday?

Rayanne – I can’t handle Church and AA in one weekend. Nice try, Father. Anyway, how many times do I have to tell you that I have no intention of becoming a Catholic?

Rickie – Well, you can’t blame me for trying. Recruiting new members is part of my job.
Last edited by TomSpeed on Jul 29th 2003, 9:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by lithiumkat » May 20th 2003, 4:39 am

If it's any consolation, despite how bad you may be getting writers block and how you may not be finding the "drive" in this story as you did in the other or whatever. I think it's amazing and I think that you are doing a wonderful job! again I must say...I'm impressed. Not that my opinion is necissarily worth anything, after all I'm just one person what do I matter. But anyway there are my humble little words of encouragement.
"people always say how you should be yourself, like yourself is this definite thing...like a toaster or something, like you can know what it is even."

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Post by TomSpeed » May 20th 2003, 8:32 pm

Thanks for the encouraging words, lithiumkat.

I have two more scenes.


*****

Part Fourteen


Location: Brian’s apartment complex, Saturday afternoon. Angela is lying on a lounge chair by the pool. She is wearing a red bikini. Brian is swimming laps. Other couples are swimming and lying about in the pool area.

Angela VO* -- Developing a relationship is like driving a car. You need directions or a map to get where you are going.

(Brian exits the pool. He walks over to Angela. He picks up a white robe from his lounge chair. His shadow drifts across Angela. She opens her eyes.)

Brian – I’m going to take a shower. Are you coming in?

Angela – I’ll be there in a few minutes.

Brian – Okay.

(Brian exits the pool area.)

Angela VO* -- Where do you see yourself in five years? Have you thought about getting married? Do you ever think about us waking up together in the morning? There’s no good way to start this conversation.

(Angela rises. She puts on her robe. She picks up her towel. She heads towards Brian’s apartment, which is on the first floor, facing the pool.)

Angela VO* -- Maybe taking some type of bold action would be better. Words are nice. But actions really count. What can I do to show him how I feel?

(Angela enters Brian’s apartment.)

Angela VO* -- Whatever I do needs to be daring and unexpected. What would Rayanne do?

(Angela pauses for a few seconds. Then she leaves the living room. She enters Brian’s bedroom. She drops the towel on Brian’s bed. And she takes off her robe. She drops the robe on the floor beside the bed. She starts for the bathroom door. She pauses. Then she starts walking again. One of her hands reaches for the doorknob. The other hand reaches behind her for the clasp to her bikini bra. The bathroom door opens. Brian is standing in front of her. He is wearing a towel around his waist. Angela drops the hands.)

Angela – Oh, hi.

Brian – Hi, do you need something?

Angela VO* -- What can I say that won’t sound stupid?

Angela – Do you want to order pizza? I’m starving.

Angela VO* -- Way to put your stellar IQ to work, Chase.

Brian – Good idea, I’m hungry, too. I’ll call and order the pizza. You can take a shower.

Angela – That’s just what I was thinking.

(Angela crosses over to the other side of the bedroom. She goes to Brian’s dresser. She takes a pair of her shorts and a T-shirt from the middle drawer. Brian picks up the telephone from his nightstand. Angela stops on her way to the bathroom door. She kisses Brian on his cheek. Brian kisses her cheek back. Angela continues to the bathroom.)

Angela – Don’t forget to order extra cheese.

Brian – You got it.

(Angela goes into the bathroom and shuts the door.)


Part Fifteen


Location: Angela’s apartment, later that evening. Angela is lying in her bed. She is talking to Rayanne on the telephone. Rayanne is in her living room in her apartment. Nathan is sitting at the dining room table coloring.

Rayanne [speaking softly] – So, what did you do after your shower?

Angela – I ate pizza.

Rayanne – You ate pizza? Oh my, what am I going to do with you?

Angela – I really was very hungry.

Rayanne – You weren’t just hungry for pizza.

Angela – Right, I was hungry for Brian’s body.

Rayanne – You said it, not me.

Angela – Well, maybe I wanted him. [pause] I want him now.

Rayanne – Go get him.

Angela – I can’t go back over to his place now. Besides, I’ve spent my quotient of courage for today.

Rayanne – I think you are headed in the right direction.

Angela – What do you mean?

Rayanne – You’re thinking about sex with Brian.

Angela – I’m also thinking about a relationship with Brian.

Rayanne – Yes, a relationship is important, too. But sex is probably more fun than building a relationship.

Angela – Building a relationship is heavy lifting. Sex is easy.

Rayanne – I love it when people quote me.

Angela – I’ve never found sex to be easy. Even thinking about sex is hard. I didn’t want to think about sex today though.

Rayanne – Angela, tell me something.

Angela – What do you want to know?

(Rayanne looks at Nathan. She rises from her sofa and walks over to the window across the room.)

Rayanne – Have you and Brian had sex yet?

Angela – No, we haven’t had sex yet.

Rayanne – Angelica, have you had sex with anyone yet?

(Angela sighs.)

Rayanne – I’ll take that sigh as a no.

Angela – All of my relationships have been complicated.

Rayanne – All of your relationships had Jordan in the background. He’s not in the picture anymore.

Angela – No, he’s not. I can honestly say that I’m free of him.

Rayanne – So, you were going to just pop into Brian’s shower and have sex?

Angela – It would have been a bold action.

Rayanne – I’d say that it would have been too bold. Even though you might think you are ready to take such a step now, you might be better off to talk with Brian about how you are feeling.

Angela – You’re telling me to talk instead of act?

Rayanne – Yes, I am asking you to talk. In fact, I think it is important that you both talk about where you think your relationship is going.

Angela – You sound like Sharon.

Rayanne – Sharon is pretty damn smart sometimes.

(Nathan approaches Rayanne. He is holding his coloring book.)

Nathan – Look, Mom. I’m all done. I stayed in all of the lines.

Rayanne – That’s great, honey.

Angela – I better go.

Rayanne – Angela, wait a minute. Say hello to Nate.

Angela – Okay.

(Rayanne hands the telephone to Nathan.)

Rayanne – Say hello to Auntie Angela, Nathan.

Nathan – Hello, Auntie Angela.

Angela – Hey, Nathan. How are you doing tonight?

*****

I debated with myself about what type of sexual history to give Angela and Brian. Thematically, Angela's virginity makes some sense. I don't really think she would sleep with someone she doesn't really love. And I think it would be hard for her to truly love someone when she hasn't closed the book on Jordan. Of course, is it realistic for a 27 years old woman to be a virgin today? In some ways, the choices I made for Angela's character make her virginity work. Angela is a driven person after high school. She finishes college and grad school. It's no small feat to do these things in approx. 7 years. She hasn't had much time for relationships. Plus, writing is a solitary thing. Her first major attempt to build a relationship outside of Jordan failed. Her relationship with Brian represents her second attempt. In a way, the fact that she has spent a large chunk of her life alone and without sex seems very sad and wasteful, esp. given Claire Danes's beauty. I must admit that my writer's block was partially caused by some doubt about Claire's ability to play Angela as an adult. It's hard for me to take Claire's looks and graft them onto Angela, who doesn't seem model-like at all. However, I couldn't really imagine anyone else playing Angela. I might write an alternate version of Angela's sexual history. But, for right now, what I've written so far works for me. With all that being said, I had to imagine how a 27 years old virgin who is now truly comfortable with her body and free to act would approach having sex for the first time. I'm not sure I got it right. I don't know if anyone except a 27 years old virgin could do the situation justice. Thankfully, I'm not one.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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Post by TomSpeed » May 22nd 2003, 11:47 am

Alternate Part Fifteen

Part Fifteen


Location: Angela’s apartment, later that evening. Angela is lying in her bed. She is talking to Rayanne on the telephone. Rayanne is in her living room in her apartment. Nathan is sitting at the dining room table coloring.

Rayanne [speaking softly] – So, what did you do after your shower?

Angela – I ate pizza.

Rayanne – You ate pizza? Oh my, what am I going to do with you?

Angela – I really was very hungry.

Rayanne – You weren’t just hungry for pizza.

Angela – Right, I was hungry for Brian’s body.

Rayanne – You said it, not me.

Angela – Well, maybe I wanted him. [pause] I want him now.

Rayanne – Go get him.

Angela – I can’t go back over to his place now. Besides, I’ve spent my quotient of courage for today.

Rayanne – I think you are headed in the right direction.

Angela – What do you mean?

Rayanne – You’re thinking about sex with Brian.

Angela – I’m also thinking about a relationship with Brian.

Rayanne – Yes, a relationship is important, too. But sex is probably more fun than building a relationship.

Angela – Building a relationship is heavy lifting. Sex is easy.

Rayanne – I love it when people quote me.

Angela – I’ve never found sex to be easy. Even thinking about sex is hard. I didn’t want to think about sex today though.

Rayanne – Angela, tell me something.

Angela – What do you want to know?

(Rayanne looks at Nathan. She rises from her sofa and walks over to the window across the room.)

Rayanne – Have you and Brian had sex yet?

Angela – No, we haven’t had sex yet.

Rayanne – So, how many fingers am I holding up?

(Rayanne hold up three fingers. Angela sighs.)

Angela – There could have been a few men you don’t know about.

Rayanne – You’re more of a tease than anything else. How many fingers?

Angela – Three.

Rayanne – Correct, Dr. Chase.

Angela -- You’re such a –

Rayanne – Bitch. I know. That’s why you love me, right?

Angela – Right.

Rayanne – Let’s see. Jordan. Some guy from college, Peter, I think. Shelby.

Angela – What are you trying to say?

Rayanne – I don’t know if you are up to pulling a Rayanne the Goddess type stunt. Plus, you might give Brian a heart attack. Your first instincts are usually correct. You’d be better off having the dreaded relationship talk with Brian. You guys need to see if you are on the same page.

Angela – You sound like Sharon.

Rayanne – Well, Sharon can be pretty damn smart sometimes.


*****

Maybe Angela having three past lovers is more realistic? Having Jordan be one of them is an obvious choice. I'll need to think about this subject some more.
TomSpeed

Patty: If Rayanne's not seeing you, and we're not seeing you, who is seeing you?
Graham: And how much of you?
Angela: Dad!
Graham: Oh, I'm sorry! I asked a question about your life, didn't I? Woah, what came over me?
http://www.last.fm/user/TomSpeed/

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