About resemblances.

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KrokRos
Angela's best friend
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About resemblances.

Post by KrokRos » Aug 2nd 2002, 6:34 am

Pedro wrote:
Posted: Fri Aug 02, 2002 8:53 am Post subject: Surgically removed from my heart....

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Okay, so I know that this post isnt really to do with the DVD set, but I just had to submit it...

As of last night, I finally and oficially got over a person i've been infatuated with for, like, almost two years!!!

I was sat there, and like Angela, I was thinking 'I loved ****** so much, and thought about him so much, and talked about him so much, that it was like he lived inside me. Like he had taken posession of my soul or something. But then one day.....I got over him. It was like ******* had been sugically removed from my heart, and I was free!!'

I even topped it off this morning with a celebration dance around my room to 'Blister in the sun' (i'm not joking!)........Its just such a relief to finally have my life back!
I thought I'd insert my story. Since someone kinda shared a part here (above). And this does not sum up as fanfiction, so I paste it here. I changed the names to the characters.

****
This Poem is dedicated to Jordan Catalano:

A Love-poem

I swear on every
bit of my heart
that I love you
The only way to
change it is if
you break my heart
once for all..

..please don't!


25/3-95
Hi!
Ever since the first day of highschool -94 I've been in love with Jordan Catalano who is two years older than me. I have found out a lot about him. He doesn't seem to be the one who goes to dances. His major is the same as mine, WAF (=Word and Art factory), Art and English. He has advanced math and advanced english. I think he is left-handed. And I think he practice Judo. His mother is finnish and his father is from Marocko.
Jordan has brown hair, half-long, to down beneighs his ears and light brown skin. He likes, as me, to play at the fotballtable. He's in special class 9th grade. He's got two sisters, one in 6th grade and one in 8th. Their names are Leila and Miriam. Leila is friends with my friend Sharon.

Jordan's eyecolor is impossible to describe. Grey? Blue? Brown? Green? I have no idea. But those eyes are the most beautiful eyes there is.
He leave exactly one minut before the bell rings for a class or he gets in late. He's often late in the mornings, tuesdays.
Maybe he knows I like him. I want him to..

I've seen Jordan play both guitar and keyboard. In music-class that is. He's my dreamguy.
He's friends with Tino, Shane, Alex, Mario etc. Not many americans.
I've played at the footballtable with him once. You play two against two or one on one. We played against two guys in 9th grade. They were about to win because it didn't go too well for us. He was playing goaly and defence, which I am much better at than he is. When the bell rang we said that the last goal would win and he made it. I would like to meet him one on one. Only me against him.

There is only twelve students in his class. Next year they'll have left our school and I might not ever see him again. I have so many mixed feelings for him. His best friend is Shane. They are so fitting for each other. Shane is real funny. He made a joke when I and Rayanne played fotball against him and Jordan. He said I played good and he wondered what my name was. I just answered "My name?". He said "What is your phonenumber?" as a joke and I started laughing. And I looked at Jordan.
Another time, Jordan was playing with someone against Tino and Alex. When they finally made their first goal, Jordan drew two points instead of one. I looked at him and he just smiled at me because he cheated without the others notecing. He was so cute.

He is exactly 5'5" tall. His eyecolor is light grey/blue. We are friends now. I think he practice Karate. Alex says he's got a black belt.
He's got a C+ in english. A B in geography and C+ in history and socialscience. I think he has a B in shop. He's got a red rusty girls bike. One handle is missing and he says the back wheel is warped. He usually goes to the city every friday with some friend. They go by bike. He's looking for a summerjob.

I have met Jordan one on one now. He got one or two goals before I won. He said it was more fun to play with more people.
One time he said he was Buddha in an earlier life. He was with Alex when he said it. He also said he was in a sect called "The Blue Light". He gave me an address like this:

Preist square
Aperoad 47
"Blue loft"

He said I should bring twenty dollars as appretiation. This was right after his religion-class.

I borrowed 15 cents from him 7/6-95.
The 8th of June, he went out of the country. I saw him in school for a while but from a distans. That night I called his house and his mom answered. I was gonna ask him if he wanted to go to the city with me. She said he was out of the country for a month. So he wasn't at his graduation. But we didn't graduate at the same time. It was seperate between the niners and the rest of us. Now I might never see him again. I miss him so much. At least he was my friend. And I owe him 15 cents.

19/11-95
Last but not least about Jordan Catalano: He's an asshole! He's finnished.

11/1-96
PS: He's not an asshole. He is forgotten. Except when I get reminded of him.

11/1-96 cont.
The last class today (thursday) was shop. Rickie made me laugh. I threw my hair back, cause it was so hot and he said "Do that thing with your hair again. It looked so sexy!" I left to get a tool and Rickie came after me and said "How's it going Angela?" And I said "Fine." "Can I help you?" he said. I said no. I went back to my desk to keep working on my shelf but it was gone. When I turned around Rickie had been holding my shelf all along.

17/2-96
Yesterday, 16/2-96, I got to school with Rayanne on the bus. When we got off I saw Jordan Catalano. He was getting on the bus. I had a sore throught so I wasn't supposed to talk but when I saw him I grabbed Rayannes arm when we got off and asked her to verify that it was him. She said it was. He had longer hair and a yellow coat or sweather or something. I like him again, still, I miss him. There is like this feeling left inside of me that likes him in some way.

13/3-96
When I wrote that poem in the beginning, it was true. He broke my heart and I don't love Jordan anymore.

1/4-96
I was getting on the bus home from the city today. I sat in the front, alone hoping to see this cute guy I've seen a week ago on the bus. I had no idea who it was but still. The next stop we stopped and then I saw him! Right accross the street! Not that guy, but Jordan Catalano! I turned around and starred! He was gourgeous! I got all hooked on him again. Someone sat down beside me, on my bag. I had to turn around. The woman said "Sorry" and the bus left the stop. I didn't see him any more, but I hope for the world that I will see him again. I sat in a dreamy fog on the bus the rest of the trip home. I can't forget him now.

28/12-96
Yesterday I was in the city with Rayanne. I had desided to be as nice to her as I could. I had been in the city the day before and asked her if she wanted to join me but she said she was going the day after (yesterday now). So I called her and said she could get a ride with me and my parents if she would be ready in time. She was happy even though my call had woken her. We walked around in the city for a few hours. I traded a film I got for christmas. I traded it for Sneakers, with River Phoenix. It was two hours and pretty good. For my christmas-money I bought a computorgame called Backpacker. You travel with a sertain amount of money around the world. It's pretty fun but takes a few hours.
When I got home I called Brian to see if he had Backpacker or had played it. Weird enough, he hadn't. I have called him a lot during our vacation. I wonder if he is beginning to get tired of me. This time, anyway, I told him I had bought Sneakers and to my surprice he said he wanted to borrow it. Or, I asked if he wanted to and he said he did. I gave him five dollars as a christmasgift because I had borrowed his computor so much. But now during the vacation I borrowed it again. I downloaded some stuff and he showed me a realy good program to edit pictures in. He also taped a film I wanted to see.
One time when we talked on the phone I was looking through some papers I had written and one was a bunch of questions I'd answered about myself. It was in 8th grade. I read them to him and when I came to the last question it said: "The Perfect guy?:". I read it and said "Guess who?". Then I told him it was River Phoenix and I thought that was kind of fun because he used to call him "my favorite".
But when I said that, he said "But what about me? I thought I was the perfect guy". I got so surpriced that I didn't know what to say but then I said "But that was written in 8th grade". I like when Brian smiles and looks at me in a sertain way but we are nothing more than friends! I don't want it any other way. I'm thinking about making a film. But I need actors and cameramen. I have lot's of ideas. The time is a quarter to midnight. Good night.

14/1-97
The time was around 6:15 pm when the bus stopped outside the gym of a school. Two guys with gymbags got on the bus. One of them had a red and black cap with the word "bears" on it. When he passed by I saw a quick glims of his eyes. Was it?? It could be! The guy I saw almost a year ago on the same bus with those wonderful brown eyes. I couldn't stop looking. He was so cute.

Home later I called Brian to tell him our phone was working again. It had been out for a couple of days. We talked for two hours. We talked about a lot of things. I'm glad we are friends.

17/1-97
I got another film from Brian today, that he taped for me. It was pretty good, better than I thought. One psycho in it ofcourse but it was fun.

18/1-97
I talked to Brian on the phone again today. I called him after dinner at 6. He had been ill since he got home yesterday so he was alone. We talked as usual about everything and I brought up the question about that he must be sick of me calling all the time and asking him for favours. He said he thought it was fun to talk to me. He wasn't sick of me at all.
We watched TV over the phone. Talked loosly about anything and then he said he didn't like this girl that he told me about before, any more. And he asked me to guess who he thought he liked now. I heard right there and then that he was thinking of me. I asked which class she was in. He said mine. I guessed on one of the better looking girls but he said no. I said he should tell me and he said it was me. I didn't know what to say. He said "You got quiet" and then he asked if I liked him. I mumbled a little and said I might like him. He wanted a yes or no. He's a bit oldfashioned in that way. I didn't know what to say. The whole situation felt awkward. I didn't want to lose his friendship and I did like him. Never really thought of it that way so.. I said we could see what happened.
I didn't see him right away. I felt I needed to think for a moment. I didn't want him to change because of this. Then it would be like my biggest problem always is, that I feel too locked and I break up with him.

9/2-97
Yesterday I told Brian I wanted us to be just friends. He said he loved me and he was disapointed, maybe even hurt. Today he asked me what was wrong with him. He really ask stupid questions.

25/2-97
Brian still likes me. I like someone named Michael. But when Brian asks me I lie and say I don't like anyone.

26/2-97
The poem I wrote at the beginning.. well, it's true. He broke my heart and I don't love him anymore. I'm over him.

*****
The End.

It's so weird how you look apon things afterwards. You realise how pathetic you where but that's just part of growing up. I wouldn't want to change much. Allthough I've had such hard times of depression... I finally found the guy for me. And with him I've grown to really appreciate myself and my life.

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just-likeKrakow
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Post by just-likeKrakow » Aug 2nd 2002, 9:19 am

Hey...thanks for sharing that.

i especially like the one line
Today he asked me what was wrong with him. He really ask stupid questions.
i think that can pretty much sum up adolescence. The thing is... i still ask questions like that, but maybe they're still stupid too.[/b]
\"She asked me if I could come over tonight and explain congruent triangles to her.\"

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Megs
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Post by Megs » Aug 2nd 2002, 3:18 pm

That reminded me of my diary, circa 1987-1989 (middle school). It reads about the same.

Isn't it a trip to go back and read it, now that you have a little more life experience? The things we worried about. Our priorities. Our friends. Our enemies. Our crushes. Our heartaches. Our triumphs. I must have experienced the *end of my world* a million times during my teen years. But there was always a beginning. It's sad, but I truly believe that youth is wasted on the young (when did I get so old?).

I think we have all had our own little version of Jordan Catalano. I didn't meet mine until my senior year in high school (the very same year that MSCL aired on ABC). Mine was the streotypical bad guy. He dressed like Jordan; even wore his hair the same way. Sometimes I believe I fell for him because he resembled Jordan. I loved him very much.

He did dump me in his car in my parent's driveway the night of our senior prom. What a scene. Me in my dress, him in his tux. Once I had the strength to leave the car, I remember collapsing on the stairs and seeing him pause, watching me cry, before he drove away. He told me later that was one of his biggest regrets in life (we are so dramamtic at that age!). But we got back together and lasted through our first year in college (separate schools). How devastating it was to lose him then. But we had a time. We really did. We had a time.

Thanks for sending me on this trippy trip down memory lane.

:)
"I have all these dreams where I know exactly what to say. And you tell me, you know, that you forgive me."

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K-man
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Post by K-man » Aug 5th 2002, 10:53 am

Wow...the axe on promnight??? That's brutal. Can't believe you ever took the guy back.
Daddy sold the farm and they've killed my trees. K-man

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Megs
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Post by Megs » Aug 5th 2002, 4:06 pm

Yup, K-man. I was one hell of a moronic 18 year old. I took that chump back, and one year later, he dumped me after he had been cheating on me with the high school daughter of one of his professors. Nice. I could go on and on about that guy.

I just watched Dazed and Confused the other day. Remember the part where they are smoking weed on the 50 yard line, and the one guy says, "If I ever refer to these as the best years of my life, somebody shoot me", or something like that. In high school and college I was like, Word. Now? I refer to those as some of the best times in my life (the mid-twenties are pretty cool , however). When did I get so old?? :shock:

Seriously, though, he is a great guy, and we are still friends.

:o
"I have all these dreams where I know exactly what to say. And you tell me, you know, that you forgive me."

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Natasha (candygirl)
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Post by Natasha (candygirl) » Aug 5th 2002, 7:17 pm

Megs wrote:I just watched Dazed and Confused the other day. Remember the part where they are smoking weed on the 50 yard line, and the one guy says, "If I ever refer to these as the best years of my life, somebody shoot me", or something like that. In high school and college I was like, Word. Now? I refer to those as some of the best times in my life (the mid-twenties are pretty cool , however). When did I get so old?? :shock:
Nah, that shouldn't make you feel old! Look at it this way - hanging out with your friends and having zero responsibilities was way more fun than a job, a mortgage, a car payment, etc. It's no wonder we look back at our youth with fondness.

As long as you don't go on and on about your high school years ("the only player to score four touchdowns in a single game at Polk High"), you're doing okay.

:lol:

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