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Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: May 23rd 2011, 8:40 am
by Mutajon

So I'm 28. A couple of months ago I read a newspaper article that mentioned a great teenage show I never heard about before called "My So-Called Life".
Being somewhat of a perpetual teenager in heart (and loving it!), I'm always on the hunt for good teenage dramas. And so I got my hands on the show, knowing beforehand that it was cut short in its prime after only one season.

Going in, the first episode left kinda on the fence but by the third I was completely in love with Angela and the show. From that point I realized I have something really unique and precious here, and after each episode I made sure how much more I have left...
At first it was great and very reassuring to see that I have 16 more episodes... 13 more... 10 more (not even halfway through!)...
But then, naturally, the episodes dwindled pretty quickly - 7 more (still OK)... 4 more (oh oh)... 2 more (yikes! its coming!).
And so yesterday I watched episode 18 (and discovered this forum!), which was pretty disappointing considering it took away one of my precious last 2 episodes and was completely off the usual MSCL spirit...

I'm now left with episode 19. The last episode. And although I'm very curious to watch it, I also find myself reluctant to do so. I know that once I'm done watching it I'll be forced to say a final goodbye to Angela and "the gang" and this wonderful wonderful show.
In a (admittedly weird) way, as long as I'm not watching this final episode I'm sorta keeping Angela, Brian, Rickie and all the others "alive". I can "turn on" episode 19 and see what's new, what they've been up to...

I know this is only a TV show, and that I'm making too much out of it. But as you guys know (better and more time then I do) this is a very special, at times magical, show. And I really just hate to see it end... It has some of the most emotionally intense, touching and on-the-spot moments I've ever seen on the screen. It captures the innocent, first time-y, turbulent feel of adolescence so precisely, that it swooshes you right back to your own feelings of the time. Which in my current perspective are the best a human can have.

Anyway, just wanted to share the perspective of a first-time viewer and new fan. In case anyone's interested... :)

And regarding that last episode, I think I'll hold on to it unwatched for just a while longer... (just please tell me that it's a good episode!)


This is a really great website and forum. Nice to know I have so much to read about the show once I'm done watching. :)

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: May 25th 2011, 11:46 am
by Bacchante
Hi Mutajon,

I believe we all know how you feel. I do the same thing with all shows I like (leave the last episode unwatched).

But you can always watch the show again, and believe me, you'll discover new things every time. So it's not like this show will be dead once you've seen all epsiodes. Also, it helps to have this wonderful forum where you can discuss your thoughts and feelings about the show.

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: May 26th 2011, 9:15 am
by Mutajon
Personally for me this is the first time I find myself in this situation. In part because this series touched me in ways I don't remember being touched by other TV shows, but also because with other shows I usually either lost interest by the time they got to the very final episode (usually because they didn't stay true to themselves) OR I couldn't have known at the time that the episode I'm watching will be the very last one...

Sure I'll rewatch it many more times in the future (or at least I hope to), and the show won't be "dead". But it will be like revisiting a loved book or movie, which is never the same as experiencing it for the first time.

Anyway, I eventually decided to rewatch the entire 18 episodes for the second time and only then watch the last episode. This way I'll have a very pleasant surprise waiting for me in a month or so. :)

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: May 28th 2011, 1:43 pm
by Bacchante
That sounds like a good plan! Have fun with your second viewing :)

And yeah, the ways in which this show affects people are quite amazing... I've been showing it to my friends and I have not yet found anyone who disliked it, not even among people who I didn't quite expect to like it. Even those who aren't going to start obsessing over it like I do still found something quite valuable in it, which made me happy.

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: May 29th 2011, 8:35 am
by Mutajon
Thanks! :)

How old are you('re friends)? Sadly, I doubt this kind of promotion will yield similar results with my "old in soul" friends...

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: May 29th 2011, 2:43 pm
by Bacchante
I'm 26, and the friends I've shown it to are of comparable age. I guess MSCL is a "teen drama" according to Wikipedia, but since I think it's a lot more than that, I don't think you need to be young to like it :) But maybe it helps ;)

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: Jun 7th 2011, 9:23 pm
by Greybird
Don't be afraid to watch the last episode. It brings many threads of the series together, as Winnie Holzman planned, given that the creators were quite sure by then that it wouldn't be renewed as a series.

You will feel satisfied in how Rickie, Jordan, Rayanne, Sharon, Patty, Graham, Hallie, and others have their stories rounded out. It's far more intriguing and complicated for Brian and, of course, Angela. They may leave you unsatisfied. "But in a good way," as Raynie would say.

Some edges are not smoothed over, and it's almost as if Holzman was encouraging fan fiction ... or, more likely, her own fiction, as there were two abortive attempts after filming episode 19 to extend the series' life. (ABC's corporate cowards, now, those people give me some disquiet. Not anything shown on screen.)

As with the 18 before it, the last tale is as vivid and pleasurable to me as it was over 15 years ago (see .sig below). I don't remember movies I've seen 15 days ago, but I remember every corner of this creation. Even the last episode's most poignant line (no spoiler): "How?"

By being brilliant. That's how.

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: Jun 8th 2011, 4:16 am
by Mutajon
Thanks for the post Greybird! :)

Sounds like this is going to be a great episode.
I'm currently on episode 15 in my second viewing of the show, and plan to watch the last episode this time around. I'm glad I saved it, it gave (and still gives) me something really exciting to look forward to - a new MSCL episode!
It's great to hear that this episode ties some things up yet leaves others unresolved, this opens the stage for our imagination (whether we put it on paper as fanfiction or keep it to ourselves).

This show is really a work of wonderful wonderful art, I'm so glad I've discovered about it...! And in a way, like said by quite a few others already, it's maybe for the best that there are only these excellent 19 episodes, which together create something which its fans never forget and always look fondly upon...

Re: Afraid to watch the last episode!

Posted: Jun 11th 2011, 5:34 pm
by Mutajon
So that's it. I've watched the last episode.

I was satisfied and relieved to see that the episode stayed true to the MSCL "spirit". The final closure of most of the story lines was also mostly satisfying, and the fact that the future regarding Angela-Brian-Jordan was left open to speculations is both a blessing and a humongous frustration...

There's also no denying I was incredibly sad to part a final goodbye from the show and characters I grew to love and care for so much... :cry: When that last scene faded out to the credits I could feel my heart twitching.
There's no doubt that this show will accompany me for a very long time, like other masterpieces that touched me throughout the years.

I'm so glad I've discovered this wonderful gem.

Now to go and thoroughly read all the great discussions that are on this incredible forum (should keep me busy for at least a year I'll wager! :) )