Well I have been watching a few epsidoes of MSCL and am curious to know what you guys think about Rayannes mum? Is she a good mother or a bad one? (NO card is all good or all bad). For instance the time when Rayanne and co had been to Let's Bolt and at Rayannes house when she was dropped off by the police officer 'no one was home'. And the night she nearly ODeed.....Amber left Rayanne in that state to meet her boyfriend Rusty (ok, so she thought Rayne was just drunk and not drugged) - should she have stayed home and looked after her?? I think maybe not but Rayanne, despite being able to fend for herself, is a very vulnerable character and perhaps she needed a little more guidance from her mum? They seem to be good friends - but is that enough?? Who thinks Amber is a nice character? Well I suppose she reacted acceptably the night of the party as she had obviously trusted Rayanne 'just to have a few friends over'...and she did mention that she would need a long talk with Rayanne about her behaviour! Any views on this one? I can't decide. If you had to choose between Patty or Amber as your mum (mom) then who would you choose??
I don't think we can label a character on MSCL "good" or "bad." They are so well-drawn and life-like, they all have their good and bad qualities, like real people.
Regarding Amber's parenting, I definitely see good and bad things about it. She does try to be her daughter's friend (which I don't think is ever good for a parent to do... at least, until they are adults) and she instills a lot of values in her daughter. Just like Patti and Angela, it's another testament to how much parents influence their children. She appears to me to be a former hippie who still tries to live in that way as much as possible, so she grants her daughter a lot of liberties most parents shouldn't. She allows her daughter to drink (not good) and doesn't notice Rayanne's growing alcoholic dependency, though she knows other things about her daughter, like what's going on in her daughter's life. But when she does learn about her dependency, she does a good job of trying to support her through recovery. At least, she tries to make sure Rayanne hasn't been drinking up to that point. When Patti confronts her, Amber states pretty certainly that Rayanne has
not been drinking.
I remember watching "Other People's Mothers" for the first time and I remember being surprised by Amber's reaction when she got back home during Rayanne's party. I think it shows both sides of her parenting. She's the type of mother who allows her daughter and her daughter's friends to drink at home (bad), but she's not the type of mother who allows wild parties and strangers in her house (good). I thought Amber would have been ok with the party, something that would have been right up her alley, but the way she acted was probably something like how Patti would have if she came home to find Angela throwing a big party at home. I was surprised that Amber fussed at Rayanne, wouldn't allow the party, threw everyone out and reprimanded Rayanne for her drunkenness. Of course, she should have seen her daughter needed medical attention and she should known the dangers of allowing a minor to drink, even at home. But the scene showed she was not just a woman who allowed her daughter to do whatever she wanted. She disciplined Rayanne and had
some boundaries.
Like most parents, I think Amber makes some mistakes. She's a single mother. She works a lot and still tries to go on dates. No one was home in the pilot episode because, unlike Angela, Rayanne doesn't have the privilege of a two-parent home. Rayanne just has a mother to support her and a father who sends money sporadically. I think it's important to note the importance of two parents in home life, especially if we're using Angela's family as a model against which to contrast Rayanne's life. A father in the household (or even one who sends money and cared for his daughter regularly) would mean more supervision at home, more consistent parenting, more money and probably a larger living space, etc. Imagine how little supervision Angela and Danielle would have if Graham wasn't in the picture, especially since Patti already works late.
I do think, though, it would be better to call Amber a somewhat
irresponsible mother. I remember the Christmas episode when Rayanne mentions the fact that Amber has brought a man over to the house who stays there a lot, making Rayanne feel uncomfortable. Also, Amber hasn't been paying attention to Rayanne's meetings with a counselor.
I would choose Patti as a mother, if I had to pick. But we could easily have a different view of Patti if we singled out small moments in the show and only had those as a basis for a decision. That's the case with Rayanne and her mother.