Wow. I liked the almost moment between Graham and Rayanne (and the repetition of the women leaning against the wall is nice, but I don't know that Rayanne would actually cry over Graham, unless there's something else going on with her -- what is it she is about to tell Sharon?) I’m excited to see what Sharon's got up her sleeve.
No one loves Hallie Lowenthal more than I, but is she really the most beautiful, and is she the swoony, weak in the knees type, or does she feel it some other way/ I like the distinction that she sees Graham in details, and he sees her as a whole. I'm not entirely sure I know what it means, but I absolutely like the idea of it.
Is it too convenient that the new girlfriend is Hallie's niece and the new boyfriend is Katimpsky's son? (I do like that he has a son though. There has to be a good story there.)
How much is Angela interested in Brian -- would she have kissed him if Jordan were not there? I liked the description of Angela searching for the letter; that was nice. Is Brian in earnest when he suggests the writing of a letter, or is it a good-natured throwback to the past?
In your story how much has Angela's and Brian's social status changed? Would everyone there really care about the kissing/ I did like the way it was written though.
Why does Danielle have a key? I like the idea of her entering that scene, but I think we need a little more exposition.
I like your depiction of Jordan's girlfriend, the opening description, and her looks at Angela at the river are great. The discussion of the anniversary and the restaurant seem a little too something for a relationship of Jordan's ... maybe too girly? Too young? I don't know if that makes sense.
Predictably, I’m excited to see where the J & A story goes. I’m unclear on how much time they’ve spent together as friends. It says that Jordan, the girlfriend, Brian and Angela in the past spend part of their evenings together, but it seems like they talk much less than that.
As for the baby’s name, I was just thinking that maybe Jordan might call her something else, maybe her initial (it sounds like a name -- ‘Elle’), as I’m sure he wasn’t part of the naming and might not feel connected to it.
I’m excited for chapter 9 and to see these different pieces come together! (It’s cool that you’re around the forum the same time I was reading.)